Who Off'ed the Prof?

Discussion in 'Fantasy Sports Central' started by Slippy, Aug 24, 2006.

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Who Off'ed the Prof?

  1. Darth Tater

    11.1%
  2. Jammertime

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  3. The Low

    66.7%
  4. Motown Pride

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  5. Warthog

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  6. linwood

    22.2%
  7. Theetfd

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  8. dlev59

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  1. Darth Tater

    Darth Tater All-Star Forum Donor 6x Fantasy Champion

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    Well Dlev, maybe if you VOTE you'll tick someone off enough to accuse you! :laugh:
  2. Darth Tater

    Darth Tater All-Star Forum Donor 6x Fantasy Champion

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    ohhh. ok thanks.
  3. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    I would like to think that finding the killer of the Prof and myself, as well as vindicating A-kmw, would be more pertinent to the PF.com membership...
  4. Darth Tater

    Darth Tater All-Star Forum Donor 6x Fantasy Champion

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    Me too. I just want everyone to vote this time. ;)
  5. aurora

    aurora Bench Warmer

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    Professor, really sorry about you getting murdered by Roscoe's killer and everything but weren't you the one that made the argument for me being Roscoe's murderer due to "obviously gratuitous posts"? I think that might be why you might be in the hot and loud place :flame: where the Pistons play in teal unis. Roscoe and I are in the cool and breezy place watching the greatest hits of the Bad Boys.

    Wait a second...Kevin McHale just said something nasty to Laimbeer and... wham!... pow!... smash! And the technical foul is on McHale?! Are you kidding me? It's great up here! :whoo:

    Listen Prof, I forgive you for your vote that led to my hanging, but I am not the ultimate judge in the matter of where you end up. I'll see if I can plead your case to the man in charge (long white beard, flowing robes, big throne...wait that's not Stern in disguise is it?) by saying that it's too harsh to hold you responsible for your delusional thinking that you had "dangerous deductive powers." Then maybe you can join Roscoe and me in Courtside seats up here. :pop2: :humble:
  6. Darth Tater

    Darth Tater All-Star Forum Donor 6x Fantasy Champion

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    Do not ask for whom the bell tolls...the bell tolls for THEE (actually it doesn't because THEE is "TFD").

    The bell tolls for someone else.

    My vote is cast.

    Hang MURDERER! Let the crows feast upon your shifty eyeballs.
  7. Slippy

    Slippy All-Star Administrator Forum Donor

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    Would like to remind those who have not voted that the poll will close tonight.

    How will the rest vote?
  8. professor

    professor Bench Warmer Forum Donor

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    Aurora, I appreciate both your forgiveness and your advocacy with the man in charge. I am a bit stumped, however, as to how you got up there since you -- like me -- voted to hang an innocent man in the last round. We're all kind of wondering about down here...that and when the A/C repairman will come (he gave us a 12-5 time slot...but you know how that can be)...
  9. Slippy

    Slippy All-Star Administrator Forum Donor

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    down there, 12 - 5 means anytime between december and may. :mad2:
  10. aurora

    aurora Bench Warmer

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    Professor, first let me say I hope you get your A/C soon. It can be hell waiting...oops...:ohwell:

    Heaven doesn't have such high entrance requirements as you might think. The reason I made it through the pearly gates was because even though I voted for an innocent man to hang (you, as a matter of fact:sorry: ) that man did not actually hang. I made a mistake that did not lead to the wrongful termination of human life. Instead I was hanged by your and linwood's wrong votes AND a coin toss.:frusty: I think the fact that my wrong vote did not result in your death and the random nature of Slippy's coin toss may have swung the thing in my favor. Mitigating factors, I think they said.

    You know it could be you are in purgatory, Professor. If so, I am sure that being a victim of a heinous crime by a serial killer will far outweigh the mark against you. It is just a matter of time and paperwork until you are seated Courtside here in Pistons heaven. Take heart!:nod:
  11. Slippy

    Slippy All-Star Administrator Forum Donor

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    I'd like to officially attest to the UTTER RANDOMNESS of the coin toss. :decision:
  12. Pwn Toney

    Pwn Toney All-Star Forum Donor

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    The best part is, if they hang me they are going to really be ticked at themselves for letting you go with all the screaming you've done. But, it will say alot that you've skated through three total killings...

    ...oh that, and the fact that another murder will happen.
  13. MotownPride

    MotownPride Starter 2x Fantasy Champion

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    Kill Low, already.

    It's so obvious he's the murderer. He never forgot to take his gloves off. :)
  14. Pwn Toney

    Pwn Toney All-Star Forum Donor

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    Gloves??? Gloves??? Next you'll be sayin I took Kato for ice cream...
  15. Darth Tater

    Darth Tater All-Star Forum Donor 6x Fantasy Champion

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    Low, you are Moriarity to my Sherlock Holmes. Unfortunately, you executed the lovely Irene Adler, but now it is your turn. If you are hanged erroneously, I'll have to live (or die) with my mistake.

    This has been a great mystery. If you are not the killer, I'm not sure where to look. Unfortunately, although you voted for LINWOOD, you were unable to articulate a reason for it. I had no choice but to pick you. Perhaps the others will be looking for my killer. But I am innocent.

    Now, quit whining and take that noose like a man. Ask Prof to leave a light on for you...you'll be arriving shortly.

    Happy trails to you...until we meet again.:yo:
  16. Slippy

    Slippy All-Star Administrator Forum Donor

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    There was a grim efficiency to the proceedings as the Low was marched to the gallows. In the air the bittersweet refrain of a saxophone wailed its lament.
    "What the fizzle?" said darth.
    "That's my theme music," replied the Low, "every black hero should have one."
    "fo' shizzle." The trumpet player launched into the solemn sound of "St. James Infirmary" and the Low cried out.
    "Oh, when I die, bury me
    In my high top Stetson hat;
    Put a twenty-dollar gold piece on my watch chain
    God'll know I died standin' pat.

    I want six crap shooters for pall bearers.
    Chorus girl to sing me a song.
    Put a jazz band on my hearse wagon.
    Raise Hell as I roll along."

    The rope pulled taught and then it was over. On Cue a DJ spun Low's Super Hero. And everyone went back to Treasure Island Casino feeling safe and satisfied that the Prof was avenged.

    "Now who the hell is going to give courtside reports on the VSL?" asked Jammer.

    Motown shrugged, "I guess we should have thought of that first."
  17. Darth Tater

    Darth Tater All-Star Forum Donor 6x Fantasy Champion

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    Halfway back to the casino

    Darth: (suddenly remembering a whispered comment as the soft wind blows by him)) "OMG! NOOOOOOOO. We hung an innocent man! "(Darth runs back and cuts Low down with a pocket knife".

    Motown: "Somebody give him mouth to mouth"

    Darth "I don't need mouth to mouth"

    Dlev: "He means Low"

    Warthog "I ain't doing it"

    Jammer "Guys, I don't think it works on broken necks"

    TFD (sniffling)

    Motown "You ok, TFD?"

    TFD:"I was just thinking...I'll never see that ten bucks Low owes me.I meant to ask him for it ,but the hanging happened so fast"

    Linwood "Yeah, man, they go by too fast. Oh well, who we gonna hang next"

    Jammer: "Why did you cut Low down, Darth"?

    Darth: "I feel horrible. Low didn't do it"

    Warthog "Well who did?"

    Darth: "I am going to reveal him after the next murder. I can't do it now because if I do, he will be afraid to act. But in case I am to be the victim, I will share the secret with one other person here in a private message before I am dead and he can reveal it to the rest of you so no other innocents die."
  18. jammertime

    jammertime Starter 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    :laugh::rofl:

    @slippy and Darth!
  19. Warthog

    Warthog Bench Warmer

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    i will not reveal why i picked linwood, but i'm stickin to it!!
  20. jammertime

    jammertime Starter 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    In light of recent events, I've changed my mind about The Low being the killer. Is it too late for a do-over? :doh:

    Um.... sorry big guy.

    And while I'm at it. Prof, if you can hear me sorry to you too. :P

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