PF.com Basketball Keeper League

Discussion in 'Fantasy Sports Central' started by webz, Oct 2, 2009.

  1. BallDon'tLie

    BallDon'tLie All-Star 3x Fantasy Champion

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    Flying Squirrels!
    Squirrels soaring in second place in first PFKL season!

    It's a little over halfway through the season and the upstart Denver Squirrels are comfortably in 2nd place behind Orbit City in the PFKL standings. Despite injuries to key players like Dirk Nowitzki and Kyle Lowry, Denver has managed to scrap their way to victory in all but 3 contests. Squirrels GM BallDon'tLie explained, "We don't have a superstar like Durant, Paul or James. For the most part, Rufus has been doing this with smoke and mirrors. I know smokes a lot of medicinal weed and I've seen him snorting some sort of powder off of a mirror on several occasions. I have to assume that these things are working for him."

    When asked about his team's success, Head Coach, Rufus Henry wasn't quite as enthusiastic about the team's position.
    "Secon place be da furce looza mutha(expletive)! We be gettin killed by doze Owebet City mutha(expletive)s!" "We gone senda posse wit sum blades to da O-C ta cut dem beotches!" added the coach. Henry went on to claim that he wasn't "frontin".

    "Rufus is a perfectionist and even though we're having a pretty good season up to this point, he feels pretty strongly that we could and should be leading the league." stated BallDon'tLie when asked about Henry's comments. "While having a few cocktails last night, Rufus laid out some of his plans to toughen up our team for the 2nd half of the season and we were pretty excited about what was discussed".

    One of the initiatives put forward by Henry was a new "pay-per-performance" system for the players. Under this system, Squirrels' players would be compensated for making hard-nosed plays and "neutralizing" opposing stars.

    "Take a guy like Kevin Durant" explained BallDon'tLie. "If Kevin Durant has a torn meniscus or a concussion, he can't score on us. We are better off with Chris Paul out of action with a busted-up knee than having him in there facing us" added the GM. "A good hard foul or 'incident' can really help our cause!" "Case in point; Kevin Love. Ever since we busted his hand again, he hasn't had one single double-double!"

    Under the new program, Squirrels players are being compensated an undisclosed amount based on a pre-determined set of objectives stated prior to each game. "I really like the set-up" said Javale McGee. "I get a certain amount for a flagrant-1 a little more for a flagrant-2 ...and I get PAID if a guy ends up being injured! They're paying us bonuses based on how long a dude is on the injured list."

    Denver General Manager BallDon'tLie went on to add, "I know football has some rules in place but as far as I know, it's perfectly legal to do this in basketball. This is just another way that we are bringing some new and innovative ideas to the PFKL!"

    This Week
    Thursday night is Misdemeanor Amnesty Night sponsored by the Adams County Police Dept.
    Bring in your subpoena or notice to appear ticket and receive a full-pardon/dismissal with paid admission to the game.

    Free Cigarette Night is back this Friday! The first 9,000 fans 15 and under will receive a free carton of Doral's with paid admission. Once again, this popular promotion is brought to you by our friends at RJ Reynolds. C'mon out to the Denver Coliseum and watch your Squirrels SMOKE the Sabertooths!
    [​IMG]
    roscoe36 and BillLaimbeer like this.
  2. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    I saw BDL posted to the thread, and I started getting angry we aren't getting our squirrels updates, and felt that if I read this and it wasn't a squirrels update, I was going to start throwing things around in this thread...
  3. BallDon'tLie

    BallDon'tLie All-Star 3x Fantasy Champion

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    Now that the Broncos are bounced from the playoffs, I hope to be getting some more coverage from the local press.
  4. Slippy

    Slippy All-Star Administrator Forum Donor

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    All we need now are tweets from CV from Linwood's team and my year will be complete!
    roscoe36 and linwood like this.
  5. dba

    dba All-Star Moderator 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    I like 'da O C'. Might be a t-shirt opportunity.

    Sent from my SCH-I905 using Tapatalk 2
  6. dba

    dba All-Star Moderator 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    I hate playing 2XR. Some Cogs are going to need to wake up or they're going to take their first loss this week.
  7. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    You haven't lost yet? Ralphi is always tough.
    TWOTIMESRALPHI likes this.
  8. dba

    dba All-Star Moderator 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    I don't think so. The first ralphi week was 5-3-1 and I think that's the closest. There were a couple of 5-4s.
  9. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    You got a target on your back now buddy!
  10. BallDon'tLie

    BallDon'tLie All-Star 3x Fantasy Champion

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    Has anyone heard from the 9th and 10th place teams this season?
    I'm playing #10 this week and it looks like nobody's been driving that bus for quite a while.
    It's too bad too because those guys would be a heckuva a nice ball club if someone was running that thing.
    (Hey, as long as you're not using CP3, you wanna trade him to me for DeAndre Jordan?)
  11. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    This is advance notice, that because of the way the standings are, I don't think I will be able to climb into playoff contention, and I will be willing to trade players for future picks. I will make that determination final after next week is over.

    As it stands, players on the block would include Carlos Boozer, Brooke Lopez, and JJ Hickson.
  12. coynejeremy

    coynejeremy All-Star Administrator 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    I'll trade you a future nose pick for Hickson.
  13. BillLaimbeer

    BillLaimbeer All-Star 4x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    I will trade you a future guitar pick for Lopez.
  14. BallDon'tLie

    BallDon'tLie All-Star 3x Fantasy Champion

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    [​IMG] for [​IMG]
  15. dba

    dba All-Star Moderator 1x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    How does trading players for picks work?
  16. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    With Rondo done, I am a seller right now. From now until the deadline, I am looking to liquidate my roster of talent I won't be "keepering"

    On the block are

    Tier 1
    Carlos Boozer
    Brook Lopez

    Tier 2
    JJ Hickson
    Tiago Splitter

    Tier 3
    Emeka Okafor
    Ed Davis

    Yep, all big men. If you have a small team, need help at the bigs, feel like you can make a push for the playoffs, I got guys you can acquire at bargain basement prices.

    I don't want talent back, I am looking for draft picks. Yep, you can defer the cost until after you can realize the gains from picking up these guys.

    Talk to me. Let's make deals.
  17. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    I'd like to work it like this. If you trade me a pick and you aren't in the draft to grab the guy I want, I get to pick another player you auto-drafted.
  18. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    I am in the process of making a trade of Lopez.
  19. roscoe36

    roscoe36 All-Star Administrator

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    Sort of surprised that there are not even half hearted offers for Boozer and Hickson.
  20. TWOTIMESRALPHI

    TWOTIMESRALPHI Team Captain 3x Fantasy Champion Forum Donor

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    well, they're simply not good :D

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